He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
