Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
