Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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