Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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