If i come over, it means nothing
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Randomize
