I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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