Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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