Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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