thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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