There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Jerry, you need to find god
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
