Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
soo... how was my night?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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