Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
sex in a hospital.. check
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
