I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
