just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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