is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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