dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
