i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
