Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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