North Korea, Best Korea!
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
My pussy is not your playground.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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