yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
