So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
