I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
