What did we do last night that was yellow?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
