But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
