and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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