I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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