tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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