just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
