Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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