He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
