shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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