Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
