I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
