Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
