im gay
i know
yea but for you.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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