Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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