Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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