i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
