I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
