just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
