If i come over, it means nothing
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
