One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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