new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
They took my balls.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
