You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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