Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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