In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
