Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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