I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
