Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Randomize
