Just mADE A PArabola og urine
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
