Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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